larger than life

With more than six years' suspension, W. Somerset Maugham's The Moon and Sixpence at last fell in my hands via

the assistance of a friend's. Interruption came hither and thither, but the story is so irresitable that I could not help

savoring every detail of the disturbing life of Charles Strickland, the fictionalized painter of Post-Impressionism, or

rather, the founder of Primitivism based on the prototype-Gauguin. I found myself in a state of confusion:

what power is so overwhelming that it drives a man to abandon his wife, children and the whole world he

has comfortably dwelt in?

 

The restless quest for self-identity? The unyielding pursuit of beauty? Or the inner tranquility of mind and soul in a

civilized yet chained world full of shackles of human bondage? In order to clothe something intangible or out of reach

in physical shell, the narrator unfolds Strickland's journey from obscurity to greatness, from ordinariness to genius in

an involved manner. His comment follows the superficially peaceful retrospect, but it reveals a world of ordinary

people who find their heart at rest despite that they have disappointed the authority of the secular world.

 

Page 184:

“I wondered if Abraham really had made a hash of life. Is to do what you most want, to live under the conditions that please you, in peace with yourself, to make a hash of life; and it is success to be an eminent surgeon with ten thousand a year and a beautiful wife? I suppose it depends on what meaning you attach to life, the claim which you acknowledge to society, and the claim of the individual. But again I held my tongue, for who am I to argue with a knight?”

 

Page 207:

“…His eyes grew accustomed to the darkness, and now he was seized by an overwhelming sensation as he stared at the painted walls. He knew nothing of pictures, but there was something about these that extraordinarily affected him. From floor to ceiling the walls were covered with a strange and elaborate composition. It was indescribably wonderful and mysterious. It took his breath away. It filled him with an emotion which he could not understand or analyze. he felt the awe and the delight which a man might feel who watched the beginning of a world. It was tremendous, sensual, passionate; and yet there was something horrible there too, something which made him afraid. It was the work of a man who had delved into the hidden depths of nature and had discovered secrets which were beautiful and fearful too. It was the work of a man who knew things which it is unholy for men to know. There was something primeval there and terrible. It was not human. It brought to his mind vague recollections of black magic. It was beautiful and obscene.”

 

(to be continued)

 

 

 

 

Bertrand  Russell is one of my favorite men of letters and his words always bear the power to invoke

my curiosity about and interest in philosophy and humanity.

 

I happended to read these lines in his "Roads to Happiness". As its name indicates, this is a book on

how to achieve happiness but our writer has more to ponder over. How to realize a perfect society?

How to attain personal freedom and the true democracy? What's the role of education in an invidual's life?

What educational philosophy should our society follow?...Questions as such are fundamentally concerned

with the whole human community!

 

A great mind cannot be regarded as great because he has made some grains of contribution to the world, but

also enlightened the oppressed souls like a guiding beacon. I do respect him for his liberal thoughts etc. although I,

like my friend, disagree with his personal love affairs.

 

The following is Russell's vision about "Happy Life":

 

最完美的爱是欢喜和美好的愿望这两种成分不可分解的结合。父母对漂亮且成功的孩子所感到的快乐即包含有这两种成份；完美的

性爱也是如此。但是，在性爱中，只有当可靠占有时仁慈才会存在，否则忌妒将会破坏它，也许同时会实际上增加观察中的欢喜。没有

美好愿望的欢喜也许是残酷的；而没有欢喜的美好愿望则容易变的冷漠和高傲。

 

我们渴望他人美好愿望的程度，是依我们感到自己需要帮助或者面临他人伤害的程度而定的。这一点似乎至少算得上是这种情境的生物逻辑，

但是对于人生则不尽然，我们渴求爱，目的在于摆脱孤独感和求得“被理解”。这是同情的问题，决不仅仅是仁慈的问题；那些对我们生有

爱意的人不仅应当希望我们好，而且必须知道我们的幸福之所在。但是，这属于美好人生的另一成份，即知识。

 

仁慈之心易于扩大，但即使是仁慈也有它的限度。如果一个男人想要娶一位女士，而且发现其他男人也想娶她，此时我们不应当认为他最好

退出来，我们就当认为这是竞争的正当范围。他对情敌的感情不能够是完全仁慈的。我认为，在人世间所有描述过的美好人生中，我们必须将

动物的活动和动物的本能视为某种基础；否则，人生将是沉闷和乏味的。文明应当成为加入人生之中的东西，而非其替代物。少数的苦行的圣者和超俗的贤人或可点缀一下社会，但若整个世界都由这类人组成，那将乏味至极。

 

上述理由使得我们将欢喜的成份作为最完美的爱的组成成份来加以一定强调。在这个现实的世界里，欢喜也免不了是选择性的，这使得我们不可能对所有的人都抱有同样的情感。当欢喜与仁慈发生冲突时，通常采用这种的解决，而非完全舍弃其中之一。我们如果将本能扭曲超过一定限度，它会采取巧妙的方式予以报复，回复原状。因此，在争取美好人生的时候，人类可能性的极限必须铭记在心。然而，这里我们又被带回到知识的必要性这个问题上来了。

 

当我说知识是美好人生的一个组成部分的时候，我不是指道德的知识，而是指科学的知识和特定实施的知识。严格地说，我并不认为有道德的知识。如果我们希望达到某一目的，知识可以给我们指出方法，这种知识也可能于无意之中转化为道德的指示。但是，我不相信我们能够判断

哪一种行为是正确的，哪一种行为是错误的，除非我们考察了其可能的各种结果。假如有一个要达到的目的，如何达到这一目的，就是科学关注的事情了。所有的道德准则都必要经受检验，即它们能否实现我们希望达到的目的。我们“应当”希望的东西，只不过是他人要求我们希望的东西。其通常是权威人士——父母、教师、警察和法官要求我们希望的东西。假如你对我说“你应该做某某事”，你这句话的动因在于我对得到你的赞赏的欲望——伴随你的赞赏或不赞赏而来的，可能还有奖励或惩罚。既然一切行为皆源于欲望，那么，很明显，道德的概念并不重要，除非它影响欲望道德的概念完全取决于对赞赏的渴望和对不赞赏的恐惧，这是一股强大的社会力量。如果我们希望实现任何社会目的，我们应当就把这股力量争取到我们这一边来。当我说行为的道德应根据其可能的结果去评判时，我的意思是说，我希望看到人们能赞赏那种很可能会实现我们所希望的社会目的的行为，而不会去赞赏相反的行为。在目前，这一点还做不到；现在还存在着某些传统准则，根据这些准则，赞赏与责备是和结果毫无关联的。

 

......

 

当我说美好的人生是由受知识引导的爱所构成的时候，那激励我的欲望是尽可能地去过这种生活，并看到其他人也过这种生活，这句话的逻辑含义是，在一个人们能如此生活的社会之中，比在一个缺少爱或者知识的社会里，可以有更多的愿望得到满足。我的意思并不是这种人生有道德的，或者相反的人生就是“罪恶的”，因为这两种概念在我看来都没有科学根据。

 

摘自Bertrand Russell 《幸福之路——美好人生》，郭义贵译，p175-179，西苑出版社，2003。

 

 

 

 

 

 

Never think of surrender to fate so easily, but as Li Kaifu said, "We should have the wisdom to

distinguish what we can change from what we cannot. And then make efforts to achieve what

we can change while retreat from what we cannot."

 

Experience unfolds a gloomy picture in my mind and I've got to realize something is going wrong

and it will never go further as I'd expected.

 

After casting the last glance back, I managed to hold fast what I've cherished for such a long

time wholeheartedly and let go of it without letting tears well up, despite the heartbroken voice

rings.

 

After all, this experience will enrich my life and has taught me a lesson unavailable either in the

coursebooks or on campus life.

 

We're different.

 

Never regret what I've done but still believe true love can move mountain.

 

 

it's kinda bizarre. it's early September, and should be much hotter. reversely, the autumn

sneaked in stealthily.

 

gathering together with old friends is really very relaxing and pleasant. some white wine,

several hot dishes and conversable chatters,all these enlightened the dim amtomsphere.

 

yet, when other people but one had gone, the one alone would feel very different.

who is the one that will side with "me" for better or worse on the journey to the second

life? parents, friends, or children will have their own life...... 

 

 

没有缘份的人，即便是在同一片天空下，也不会再相遇

The following passages taken from a famous best seller "The Power of Positive Thinking"

by Norman Vincent Peale are dedicated to those young people like me who want to live

a life worthwhile.

 

There is surely no consummate formula for everyone to live a successful life because 

the meaning of success can be of great difference. But Dr. Peale has proposed one formula

that turned out to change many people's life, especially those who had gone through seemingly

unbearable hardships and suffereings or mental breakdown. 

 

In order to live a simple yet effective life, Dr. Peale says we should abide by certain formula, namely,

"to know what you want, test it to see if it is a right thing, change yourself in such a manner that it 

wll naturally come to you, and always have faith. With the creative force of belief you stimulate that

particular gathering together of circumstances which brings your cherished wish to pass."

 

"If you believe in your job and in yourself and in the opportunities of your country, and if you believe

in God and will work hard and study and put yourself into it -- in other words, if you 'throw your heart

over the bar', you can swing up to any high place to which you want to take your life and your service

and your achievement. Whenever you have a bar, that is to say a barrier, in front of you, stop, close your

eyes, visualize everything that is above the bar and nothing that is below it, then imaginatively throw

'your heart' over that bar and see yourself as being given lifting power to rise above it. Believe that you are

experiencing this upthrust of force. If in the depth of your mind you visualize the best and employ the powers

of faith and energy, you will get the best."

 

"Naturally in this process of achieving the best it is important to know where you want to go in life. You can

reach your goal, your best dreams can come true, you can get where yo uwant to go only if you know what your

goal is. Your expectation must have a clearly defined objective. Lots of people get nowhere simply because they do

not know where they want to go. They have no clear-cut, precisely defined purpose. You cannot expect the best if

you think aimlessly."

 

"If you want to get somewhere, you must decide defintely where you want to be or what you want to accomplish. Be

sure it is a right objective, then photograph this objective on your mind and hold it there. Work hard, believe in it, and

the thought will become so powerful that it will tend to assure success. There is a deep tendency to become what your

mind pictures, provided that you hold the mental picture strongly enough and if the objective is sound."

 

"A man who is self-reliant, positive, optimistic, and undertakes his work with the assurance of success magnetizes his condition. He draws to himself the creative powers of the universe."

 

"It is indeed a fact that the person who thinks with positive self-reliance and optimism does magnetize his condition and release power to attain his goal. SO expect the best at all times. Never think of the worst. Drop it out of your thought, relegate it. Let there be no thought in your mind that the worst will happen. Avoid entertaining the concept of the worst, for whatever you take into your mind can grow there. Therefore take the best into your mind and only that. Nurture it, concentrate on it, emphasize it, visualize it, prayerize it, surround it with faith. Make it your obssession. Expect the best, and spiritually creative mind power aided by God power will produce the best."

____p.101-103, "Expect The Best And Get It" from the Power of Positive Thinking, Peal, Norman Vincent.  

It is the first time that I've seen IMAX. What impresses me most is not the museum itself,

but the overwhelming myth of Nature, the earth and the mysterious origin of living creatures

in the deep ocean.

 

一剪梅

红藕香残玉簟秋，

轻解罗衫独上兰舟。

云中谁寄锦书来，

雁字回时月满西楼。

花自漂零水自流，

一种相思两处闲愁。

此情无计可消除，

才下眉头却上心头。

—— 李清照

 

Years had passed befor I finally realized we were doomed to encounter and then part.

 

Your voice, your words and your laughter have been imprinted on my heart and on my

soul so deeply that time, the great healer, can never fill the void of the stuffy room in

which I am now perching together with all my happiness, sensibility and the lingering

melancholy, and the sense of loss.

 

People say it's no big deal. Friends urge me not to look back but move on. Yes, it's really

no big deal. Everybody must keep in their own story in their own favorite manner.

 

 

"Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence

in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy. But with sould self-confidence you

can succeed. A sense of inferiority and inadequacy interferes with the attainment of your

hopes, but self-confidence leads to self-realization and successful achievement."

—— Norman Vincent Peale